Don’s Ego

12/03/2009

Random, Part 10 – Take a Break

Filed under: Uncategorized — donkowalewski @ 4:50 pm

Have  you ever felt like this dude? Maybe you just decided, f’ everyone …I’m sitting this one out. I don’t care who needs me or what I should do …I ain’t doin’ it.

Too damn funny.

For those who care, yesterday began my 41-Days of Hol-Idol-Day Cheer or something …I forget what I called it. But I’m going to try and write something original pertaining to American Idol starting now all the way up until the January 12th season premiere. Check out my first offering at spunkybean – you know the address and ’secret knock’ by now, I’m sure.

Anyway, take a break and read my stuff, won’t you?

11/30/2009

Dedication, Part 1: A New Post Every Day

Filed under: Dedication — Tags: , , , — donkowalewski @ 5:08 pm

How many times have I suggested I should post every day? The answer may surprise you.

15 times. But I ‘think’ about that fact much more often. And I really should. I do it for spunkybean (well, my faithful, talented writing-staff actually makes sure there’s fresh content every day).

I’m bringing this up because I just read  this …and I’ve gotta get my act together.

Happy post-Thanksgiving. This is the first “Dedication” entry which might be the entries you skip for a while. These entries are designed for nothing else than to fill the page.

My scalp itches. I’m not using ANY product in my hair, going on two weeks. Coincidence? I hate to think that my scalp is conditioned to respond only to gel or molding mud, and without it, my body’s natural oils wreak havoc. But I can tell you …right now …it’s taking all my will power to refrain from scratching.

As I have Facebook’d and Tweeted …I went to see Star Wars In-Concert over the weekend with my 5-year-old. To say it was “spectacular” is an understatement. As a pedestrian-fan of the franchise, I’m mostly “geeking-out” over Star Wars (30-years after it burst onto the pop-culture landscape ) because my son couldn’t be more into it. In fact, I recently saw Clone Wars (released in theaters a couple years ago) and I know it sucked and I know why grown-up geeks probably hate that movie …but ya know what? My five-year-old LOVED it, therefore, so did I.

There you have it. A blog entry. Also on my agenda this evening …a new article for spunkybean (possibly more than one) as I attempt to kick-off my “25-Days of Idolmas” …or “Idol Advent” or something cleverly named to link American Idol with Christmas, and use that spunkybean thing as an outlet, where I’ll write a new article every day leading up to the January 12th season premier of American Idol. And I should write a Mel Robbins entry. And a Fit Kids Connection entry.

When did writing become so time consuming? And when did I become a Lady Ga Ga fan? Not really a fan …but I find it impossible not to like her songs. Argh!

11/16/2009

Accomplishments, Part 1: A New Category for New Adventures

Hi, loyal readers (all three of you). I told you, whenst next I blogged something, I’d be able to brag about a few things. Trouble was, my cleverly titled headings (‘Random’, ‘Pithy’, and ‘Passions’) didn’t really capture the spirit of this entry.

Do you ever have one of those weeks or weekends where it feels like the stars align and things (everything) go great? Mine was such a weekend.

Friday, I wrote. Saturday, I woke up and the leaf raking I did the previous weekend still had my lawn cleared of leaves. I made pancakes for the family. The carpenter who was going to hang solid-wood, six-panel doors on our bedrooms arrived on time to finish the job. Two guys hired to knock down 6 layers of bricks on our chimney and rebuild it also arrived on time. They all did great work. The six-and-under girls soccer team I coach scored 2 goals in a 2-0 victory (matching our entire season-long scoring – yes, we only scored two goals total in the other 7 games …I played fullback (defense) in my playing days …cut me some slack …we only allowed a total of 9 goals in those 7 games …we’re working on it …offense wins games …defense wins championship …you’ve heard about that, right?). With Saturdays victory, we ended the season 1-4-3 (we played to more than one 0-0 tie …because we’re a defensive team, as I mentioned). To end the season on this note (a flood gate of goals – all two of them) has me and all the parents quite optimistic for the springtime. Not only did we actually score two goals, I dare say we could have had 10 more. But these six year olds are awfully polite, and when they see a wide open net, they graciously allow the goalie to get into position to make a save. And when they dribble past someone, they sportingly allow the defenders time to get back into position and and try to stop us again.

It’s really quite nice, and as a parent you are proud to see how nice and thoughtful your daughter is. But as a coach, it’s a bit maddening.

So, my six-year-olds won their soccer game, and then I was home in time to sweat through an improbable victory by my Michigan State Spartan football team. And from there, it was onto a dinner party with friends – friends with children, which means all the kids run around and break stuff and scream and fight amongst themselves, and we parents can actually talk about something other than who pulled who’s hair, who started what, and further explantions as to how a Lego ended up in both nostrils.

Did I mention those doors? Or old doors never closed. Now they do. And our old master bedroom door never stayed open. Now it does. I should make some connection to new doors, opening new doors, and use them as a metaphor to life and how I’m opening new doors and “walking through them” and stuff like that. Or how “building” and “rebuilding” my chimney was akin to my rebuilding my writing hobby and my blog …but, I hired those things out, so it’s not really like I did them. Watching someone else install new bedroom doors and fix your chimney would be the same as if I just read some blogs and bought a book.

But, I really could’ve used the metaphor, except for that big flaw in the arguement I just pointed out.

I mentioned, I blogged. Then I met with my new client, Fit Kids Connection, and I got them all rolling with Facebook, Twitter, and their blog. You should check it out. And more than that, you should order something and tell ‘em “Don sent me.”

And if I could’ve logged into the Mel Robbins blog, I would’ve also pointed you to a hilarious (sarcasm) article I was going to write about epidemic OxyContin addiction levels in the greater Boston area, and how people can get help, or help someone they love who’s found themselves in the grips of addiction. Don’t worry …I’ll let you know when I write that jaunty little entry. Until then …keep hanging doors, building chimneys, and scoring goals.

11/13/2009

Pithy, Part 3: Writing the Ship

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , — donkowalewski @ 11:01 pm

It’s Friday. It’s November 13th – Friday the 13th (to be exact). The kids are in bed. The wife’s Book Club is at my house. I’m around the corner in a coffee shop.  My laptop is open and I’m the twelfth person here doing that very same thing (I cannot actually confirm that anyone else is here while a Book Club takes place in their living rooms at home, but they are here, drinking coffee, and plugging away on their laptops). There’s a group of teens hanging out, together, but all laptopping it. There’s a couple sitting at a table, together, both laptopping. All the other laptoppers are singles. And none of them picked my awesome spot near a power outlet.

Why there isn’t a power outlet by the two chairs adjacent to the fireplace, I’ll never know? That’s where I want to be.

I’m here because I’m woefully behind in my writing. Have I bitten off more than I can chew? I have a list of things to write …this blog entry (almost done). A blog entry for a new client. I’m embarrassingly behind in my Mel Robbins blogging, and I hardly write anything new (or good) for spunkybean. It’s 9:30 EST and I’m going to wrap this up, quick, and hope to get to those other 4 things.

Funny thing about a hobby that you turn into a passion, and then you one day start to daydream could actually turn into a career …the minute you involve other people, those people start caring about what you do and depending on you to do those things. I’ll admit, I spent a good portion of my life teaching myself to ignore the guilt of dropping-the-ball, failing to follow-through, inventing excuses, and completely wimping out and ending something for, really, no good reason.

This is some cheery stuff, eh? The point is, I’m looking to shed those bad habits and power through all of this. Like Nike said – just do it. So, here goes. When next I blog at you, I should have a buncha wonderful links to all sorts of things I’ve written, and for the half-dozen of you who hang on my every word, you’ll be happy.

Speaking of happy (sarcasm), I debuted the first chapter of my theoretical novel to my writing club and …ahem …let’s just say I have a little more empathy for what The Elephant Man must’ve gone through. My story followed a beautiful short story about an old Polish woman, the daughter of immigrants, who learned many years ago she loved to write letters. The story was her making sure that, upon her death, all the letters she’d written for her children and grandchildren be delivered as directed. She didn’t have much, but she hoped her thoughts and stories would live on through her letters and her lineage. It was very, very good. Another offering was by a woman who survived breast cancer and found Jesus. The story told of an old woman who failed her entire life to say what was on her mind and how she would use every remaining breath to right that shortcoming, spread the word of Jesus, and make sure everyone she loved could know exactly how much she loved them – she found her voice and she was going to sing from the mountaintops. Another story was about 5 mechanics from World War II.

Mine was a profanity filled first chapter featuring two kids talking like adults about their crappy future-lives, and a talking tree. Which stinks, because the rest of my novel, in theory, is much more focused and will hold my eulogies, toasts, and motivational essays as a story. And I think it could be really good.

You have no idea how profusely I was sweating as the Jesus-woman-cancer-survivor had to read “mother fucker” and “son of a bitch” out loud to the group.

Perhaps I’ll toil away in anonymity for a while.

OK. I’m off to blog elsewhere. Wish me luck.

 

11/03/2009

Random, Part 9 – Happy Housewives Day.

http://cucharasonica.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/weezer-raditude-aa.jpg

It’s November 3rd, do you know where your voting precinct is? Better yet, do you know where your list of 2009 Resolutions is? Mine is crinkled and covered in coffee stains, and not many of those resolutions were checked off. Some were revised. And some, now, looking back, just seem silly.

But in a way, simply having them written down makes 2009 seem like less of a lost cause because, truth be told, I did make some headway towards the bigger picture stuff. Like this blog. There was some writing. And spunkybean …I definitely wrote some stuff there. And Mel Robbins’s blog. Almost 1oo entries were written in 2009, and guess who wrote them all? Oh, yes …yours truly. So, now if I can just focus a bit more in 2010 (or even the remainder of 2009), I can maybe hone my craft, better target someone who might actually pay me in something other than Starbucks cards, and get one step closer to earning a living as a writer.

But that’s just me, and not why you read this blog. Oh, wait. Yes, “me” is exactly why you read this blog.

No. Not today. Today I turn my blog spotlight outwards and back at you, loyal reader. Today I celebrate the Housewife in honor of National Housewive’s Day. It’s a helluva lotta work to be at home all day with your family, enjoying all their milestones and memorable moments. What one woman calls “home making” or “housewifing”, another man might call “vacation” or “what-he’d rather-be-doing instead-of crunching-numbers-in-a spreadsheet or talking-for-hours-on-the-phone while-viewing-a power-point presentation.”

You say tomato, I say razzle-frazzle-frickin’-burgle-grumble.

Enjoy my love letter to the housewife at spunkybean, won’t you?

And enjoy Weezer’s new video for “(If You’re Wondering If I Want You To) I Want You To”, but you’ll have to click the link because I can’t embed it.

And lastly, here’s a funny person with a funny blog. She’s now in my blogroll (at the right).

11/02/2009

Random, Part 8 – Pulling in the Net

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , , — donkowalewski @ 4:10 pm

*** This entry was written a week ago and never posted, because I wanted it to be perfect. Then I remembered …oh, yes ….it’s for your blog, Don. And hardly anyone reads it. Post what you got. ***

Greetings from a Starbucks just north of Columbus, OH. I got an early start and, well, got here early. I have a few sales presentations over the next two days, and I feel woefully under prepared, but I’m hoping a little pre-meeting blogging will get me ready. I also hope the fan in my room keeps the air moving enough that I won’t get Swine Flu – I place my hope in things that don’t make any sense, I admit.

First things first – if you are trying to reach me on Twitter, I’m going through a Tweetox (TM) period. I got into Twitter and got into it bigtime. For the better part of a month, I lived on Twitter. I followed everyone and everything. I obsessed about every single new Twitter client, better Twittering techniques, all my favorite TV characters, shows, and trivia, I followed @CNN, @NYTimes, @DrudgeReport, clients of mine, advertising agencies, advertising trade magazine feeds, stuff about soccer coaching, stuff about @1Saleaday, @edealinfo, @WritersWorld, @WritersDigest, @WriterPrompt, @spunkybean (which I write the Tweets for), and so much more. I felt like, with Twitter, I could know EVERYTHING. It felt real empowering, and then suddenly, it felt overwhelming. And uncontrollable. And coworkers and friends laughed at me. My Twitter reader of choice, Seesmic, was always open. And then I switched to brizzly. I thought, if only there was a way to get my emails bounced from my Inboxes into my Twitter feed (there is, actually, and it’s called Gist – and I tried it). I attempted convincing my wife to join Twitter so she could Twitter things like, “@donkowalewski stop on the way home for diapers, milk, and Ziploc snack-size bags.” I wished my whole life, and everyone I knew, could get on-board with Twitter.

See, it wasn’t that Twitter had no point …it has too many points. For example – think of something you like? Maybe it’s golf. If you start following @GolfDigest and @GolfWorld, then you might feel compelled to follow Tiger Woods. Then Nike (because those are his clubs). And then @NikeGolf. And who makes golf balls? @Titlelist, that’s who? And better than their feed is @TitlelistTips which gives daily, or thrice daily, golf tips. And then …and then …you see what happens?

The Wizard of Ads calls it a rabbit hole down which a beagle chases a rabbit - and rabbit holes can go on forever.

I had to stop. I may actually go back in a few weeks if I can figure out a way to control my Twitter feed obsessions. I’ll bet there’s a @Titter_Tip for that …must …resist.

My other current obsession is my Zune HD. Another distraction. I could be writing something for spunkybean, for Mel Robbins, or some other freelance things, but instead I’m obsessing about perfectly syncing my entire music library with my Zune, while backing up all the files to a new 250 Gigabyte external hard-drive.

Gotta run. I have quotes to share at a later date, and my philosophy on time management.

Add this song to your mp3 player. “List of Demands” by Saul Williams. Yes …from the Nike commercial.

“My better is better than your better.” -Unknown

10/23/2009

Random, Part 7 – Greatness

Filed under: spunkybean — Tags: , — donkowalewski @ 8:33 am

You don’t have to win the Superbowl or have a 7,000 square foot home to be the best. On any given day, at a single moment, you might be the best at something and everyone will be looking at you. That’s what this commercial says to me. “Fifteen minutes of fame?” Whatever! Fifteen minutes of awesome, more like it. And when you get your 15-minutes, make it really, really awesome.

10/07/2009

Random, Part 6 – South Park, Verve Pipe, Family Life

Today, I’m at Borders. This free Wi-Fi is the best I’ve ever experienced. Consider me impressed. Can’t find a power outlet to save my life, but my battery is charged, so for today, management will be spared my tirade (and patrons will be spared my 100-ft orange extension chord)

In a stark contrast to the next part of this blog entry, South Park premiers tonight. “Ike Has a Secret”. Hard to believe South Park’s been on for over a decade. If I could embed the video preview, I would, but I can’t, so click here.

The Verve Pipe (remember the song “Freshman”?) reunited and released this children’s CD. Click the link. You can listen/stream the entire CD. Me? I kinda like it. I really have to convince myself this emo-angst-ridden Gen X group, and their lead singer, Brian Vanderark, are truly capable of being this upbeat. But once I’m sold on that, I’m buying the CD.

This morning was nice. I shined shoes and taught my 5-year-old son to shine his shoes. I let my 6-year-old daughter do my hair. Both did great jobs. The boy used a sock, some polish, and worked the leather real nice. Then he buffed and shined them with expert form and precision. The girl took a little Aveda molding mud in her palm, rubbed her hands together, and then deftly sculpted my coif even better than I do it myself.

Either this was just a sweet, beautiful bonding moment between me and my two children, or I’ve discovered something each has an aptitude for and they may never aspire to anything greater. What if, right?

Oh, and my workout-slash-running song of the day* is “Meant to Live” by Switchfoot. They don’t allow embedding of the song (which is crap), but add it to your workout mix, y’all. Check out the lyrics!

Fumbling his confidence
And wondering why the world has passed him by
Hoping that he’s bent for more than arguments
And failed attempts to fly, fly

[Chorus]
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside

Dreaming about Providence
And whether mice or men have second tries
Maybe we’ve been livin with our eyes half open
Maybe we’re bent and broken, broken

[Chorus]

We want more than this world’s got to offer
We want more than this world’s got to offer
We want more than the wars of our fathers
And everything inside screams for second life, yeah

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live
We were meant to live

* all “songs of the day” are intended to be played and enjoyed at very high volume

10/06/2009

Random, Part 5

I know a guy writing a book. Let’s say this “book” was going to be an autobiography. And let’s say that this “autobiography” was going to tell a tale of a pretty normalish, average, Midwestern, applie-pie eatin’ and baseball watchin’ kinda guy? And let’s also say the guy writing the autobiography wasn’t really a famous columnist or personality, never fought in a war, never rescued anyone from a burning building, has more debt than he has money in the bank, and mainly was just a collection of kinda interesting essays, toasts, and speeches he’s either (a) given or (b) imagined himself giving to some small audiences?

Would you buy that book? What if you had $5 coupon to the bookstore and you knew the guy who wrote it? What if it was out on paperback? What if the book was part “story” and part “motivational” and part “cookbook?” What if the book had 20 blank, lined pages near the back where you could take notes? What if there were drawings from the author in that book? And what if that book was kinda, sorta like quite a few other books already out there?

How many copies can I advance order you? What? You’re not sold?

Here’s the thing about writing a book. (A) If you are not rich, accomplished, or famous already, it’s fair to wonder why anyone would ever read your book. (B) When I go to a bookstore (or library), there are thousands and thousands of books not sitting in the “best seller” racks or on the “staff favorites” tables and I wonder …”did those poor fools really think anyone would buy their books?” (sometimes guilt overcomes me and I will randomly select a book from a random section and buy it, and then I’ll just wonder what that author will think when he gets his monthly book-sales statement and how happy he’ll be that he won’t be charged back for unsold inventory ..makes me feel like a hero). (C) Should I call my book Jerry Kotter and the Sorcerer’s Stoned so that it gets listed on Amazon in the “people who bought this book also bought” section by the Harry Potter books and the Welcome Back Kotter tell-all books …and books about magic and marijuana? And finally, (D) are these ideas really my own? I live in constant fear that every good idea I’ve ever had is simply me forgetting where I heard that brilliant and original idea in the first place. Like, when I did stand-up, this one time, I wrote a joke about animal pick-up lines, and someone watching my act walked up to me afterwards and said, “not very cool that you took so-and-so’s jokes right off his CD.” I didn’t do it on purpose, but at the time I “wrote” those jokes, I swore they were divinely entering my brain.

So, to any published authors who might read my future book I have yet to finish, publish, promote, or sell, and if you end up reading your exact thoughts and ideas nearly verbatim …I swear …I didn’t steal your ideas on purpose.

And have I blogged about this before? Another challenge I face when writing is that I write in 4 or 5 different places, I don’t catalog my ideas, and its very possible I’ve written the same things over and over again.

Another challenge I face when writing is that I write in 4 or 5 different places, I don’t catalog my ideas, and its very possible I’ve written the same things over and over again.

Get it? Well, at any rate, I’m taking my first two chapters of my book …er …this “guy I know’s” book, to my writing club next week and we’ll see what they think. 

Why can’t my blog embed video using html code? I’m beginning to really hate WordPress. Click the link below for something cool to watch.

Blog and Website Workshop from Wizard Academy on Vimeo.

Luckily, Miley Cyrus’s hit song, “Party in the USA” embeds just fine.

10/02/2009

Inspiration, Part 2 – spunkybean and more…

I love when I walk into a Caribou Coffee at lunch and the premium table and writing spot, with the perfect Feng Shui, and a power outlet, is vacant and I can plop right down into it.

I hate when, on my way to Caribou, I think of something clever to write, and then forget it by the time I get there.

I’m writing a huge, self-indulgent email to promote myself. By now, people are either sick of me, laughing at me, or secretly planning my demise. I hope there’s a few who, well, still like me and read what I’m writing, and ‘click’ on the links I send them (after all, I don’t worry so much about who reads what, so long as they ‘clicked’ on the article).

Did I ever think my accomplishments would be measured by a ‘click’? At one point in my life, I’m sure I thought applause and whistling would be great measures of my success …now …’clicky’, ‘clicky.’

Either way, it’s Self Promotion Month, so look for an email from me begging you to read everything I do. It should consume most of your day, every day.

I started a 3-day challenge through my affiliation with Mel Robbins and her gang. That ended today. I came pretty close to my goals. I wrote 3-things every day, landed a new social media consultation client, and was asked to submit a writing sample for another writer-motivator-blog-guy. I want to write “funny”, but I guess I’m becoming “serious” or “preachy”. Won’t my kids be happy when they are teenagers and their Dad has spent the better part of  a decade writing Up With People-Happy-Happy Feel-Good essays?

“Come on, kids. You can’t control the bully at school and your mean teacher, but you can control how you react to them. Remember that book I read you about the Holocaust survivor and his approach to certain death, torture, and the loss of his entire family? Oops. Sorry I burnt your toast. But it’s OK, from each mistake we make, we learn a lesson.”

They’ll hate me.

Read my Mad Men article.

Tonight I’m going to see funny man Norm MacDonald at The Royal Oak Music Theater. I hope he doesn’t do these exact jokes, because I already laughed at them just now.

Oh, and here’s a company where I think it’d be fun to work.

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